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| The SandraK issue. Can we do this without the fight, Please? - Goto page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 Next |
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FocusFactor
 Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 12:52 pm |
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The SandraK issue. Can we do this without the fight, Please?
It DOES affect the whole board, not just a few.
Just for a minute, I will take the focus off JennyM and bring it back to the SandraK issue....
The issue I mean is Sandra's deception of this board. I'm not familiar with the other boards, but I understand she posts different things to different people. Not a question, it is well known. Deception.
SandraK (and grantbk) was an integral part of the outting Medleyrelay did to Roger/Sam Redman. On Wednesday night, SandraK threatened to tell his real real name (oh the drama) and said she knew all about us. To prove that, she posted a little of the RL drama in some of our real lives. Someone has a law problem, several have family issues and problems. SandraK was NOT joking about any of that.
She knew some of it from chat, some of it from plain old friendly posts, and some of it from what I think is the bigger issue.
Investigation of names. Names she learned from Medleyrelay who collected for the Scrux open letter to Oprah Paypal fund.
Some of you see this as "No Big Deal"
I see it as a "Big Red Flag"
Upthread, a common misconception was made about Paypal and that is that you use a nic there, and that is all the person sees when money is donated as was done in this instance.
For Paypal, the person, in this case Medleyrelay, sees your name address and phone # if you have put that in. Your real name, not any nic (a nic is what they see for bids at ebay or any auction site until the item is paid for).
The money goes directly from your bank or linked credit card to the account of the person (again in this instance Medleyrelay).
From there, the person can send the money to their own linked account.
This is not about the money. I have NO doubt that Medleyrelay was upfront totally and honest etc etc. This is not any sort of claim that Medleyrelay used any money collected other than it's intended purpose, the Oprah letter.
From what I saw in the last week with Medleyrelay, grantbk, and SandraK, they hinted and straight out SAID they knew more than a normal poster on any message board needs to know.
What was thought to be SandraK's meltdown here Wed, was just anger. Rage that some of us knew what she was doing. She posted things to straight out confirm what I thought to be true.
RL outtings probably pose no real life danger here. Do I think any of those 3 are dangerous? No. In the physical sense, no.
INTIMIDATION. That is mostly what this info is good for.
Knowing someones real name and state, send it to a search engine, see what you come up with on just a free search. For a fee, (Intelius for example) will tell you much much more. Even IF you have no dirty laundry, you don't want someone snooping into your life and posting for everyone to see.
OK... I just wanted to explain my position and what this all means to me.
I know I am right.
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| JennyM
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 1:05 pm |
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Thanks for this, FF. Thanks for explaining it so well.
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** Banned **
Joined: 24 Mar 2006
Posts: 7908
Location: America. Home of the brave and the free
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| gilligan
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 1:09 pm |
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Whatever Sandrak does on this or any other board does not affect me. Not at all. I am only responding to FF's claim that sandrak's latest crap affects everyone.
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| likestoflap-lol
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 1:14 pm |
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your wise to be worried
I THINK YOUR RIGHT TOO. THE LAST DAYS BEFORE SHE WENT BONKERS she was friendly saying she is everyones friends in pms i bet. she did to me. i trusted and gave her my real first name prior. also city i live in.... i also told her she should check out google on her own nic as i see associated with her name and maybe a myspace of her family. i told her this so she can REMOVE it if it is her info --to be cautious no one hurts her. she said my kids can do what they want---no denial no saying thanks . she asked if people thought julia was her sis and i said i even did as she posted it herself on other sites and bragged of a famous sister r in aruba. you know if you put shit out it flushes back if the septic does not work. we need to be aware of new nics registering or if she has multiples as they say --i am back can happen real fast. yes -your right to be concerneed --will all be peaceful in this discussion--I DOUBT IT . her behavior was shocking but it was clear she was on a roll --if she has a famous she is s very luck to have info to share with us but she got carried away if true with power she felt she had perhaps.
Last edited by likestoflap-lol on Fri Sep 29, 2006 1:17 pm; edited 1 time in total
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** Banned **
Joined: 24 Mar 2006
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Location: at the mall buying purple sandals to meet clients -oh my~!
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| Zrinyi
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 1:16 pm |
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INTIMIDATION. That is mostly what this info is good for
Without a doubt, because it sure wont solve this case.
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Did not get da Clue
Joined: 29 Jul 2006
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Location: CIA Headquarters
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| victims cry
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 1:17 pm |
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It will be peaceful because its going to moderated.... thats where no fights are allowed.
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On Vacation!
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| Fiery
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 1:40 pm |
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Last edited by Fiery on Sun Oct 01, 2006 2:09 am; edited 2 times in total
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Who died and made YOU Darth Vader?
Joined: 23 Mar 2006
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| BhamMom
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 1:49 pm |
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FF,
I think you are absolutely correct in your assement of the situation. I do not think there is any real danger by what has been done because like you, I do not think these people are dangerous in the physical sense. Because I have always stated there was no danger when these events were occuring I have been accused of thinking the release of r/l information is okay. It is not and I have stated it. It is just that what has been posted on r/l people has not been anything that would put their lives in danger.
This is the internet and regardless of what people say, r/l information can be found on people that post. We are all careless with our personal information at times and do not even realize it. To be honest, I have posted enough about my family and what we do that anyone on this board could go back to some of my old posts and with little effort get my name. If they got that, all they would have to do is look up my phone number because I'm listed and viola.......you would know where I live.
I guess the point I'm making is that we do tell much about our families and sometimes don't realize just how much. Then again Focus, we all have skeletons in our closet. I'm sure that each and every poster here has a family issue of some kind or other situation we are not proud of.
I guess what I cannot get over is how involved people get with other posters on the personal level. I think that is where the issue comes into play. I mean, how could anyone here find any dirt on me by searching for B'hamMom? They can't. Then again, like I said before, I have given enough personal information in posting that it probably would be possible to do r/l investigating of.
Sorry to disappoint people but I do not have a criminal record. I don't even have a DUI. In fact, my credit is protected. If anyone even does a search to obtain credit information on me, I get an email telling me who the inquiry was made by. I learned my lesson years ago through my ex-husband with credit cards. I was lucky, I caught what he was doing and maintained my excellent credit. Not everyone is quite so lucky.
A word of caution here. It is worth the money to buy a credit protection plan that will alert you to these problems. The one I have is $12.00 a month and I think of it as an insurance policy.
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** Banned **
Joined: 23 Mar 2006
Posts: 13086
Location: Posting with bitter people
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| FocusFactor
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 2:03 pm |
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| gilligan wrote: | | Whatever Sandrak does on this or any other board does not affect me. Not at all. I am only responding to FF's claim that sandrak's latest crap affects everyone. |
gilligan, I know it doesn't affect you. It won't affect any of the people who posted with SandraK on the BDR thread, unless she hates them.
Sandra told me things in PMs to get me to post it. I didn't take that bait.
When I say it affects the board, I am talking in general terms.
SandraK was here for how long? A year now? First she was thought to be in Aruba, then paying attention it was clearer.
She pretended to be some exotic person who KNEW things. Things only "in the know" posters knew. Ones with "inside information". It was used as a tease. Which is fine.
But when she said things that could be only rumor:
"the Twittys divorce"
"MB kids bought heroin traded ipods"
"the bar bill was 18K"
lots of "things" little tidbits, like-- about GVC, like-- about Lorenzo, like about people in ALE, like-- about-- lots of things I can't even recall.
we went with that as fact. Me included. I remember arguing over it on CTV, and even here I was buying it all hook line and sinker but it was a GAME. I don't know, I would believe some of it to be still true.
My wake up call came when she was outraged over the Fridge outing of her.
And then turned it around with a lot of lying, pretense, drama, and then finally the time-out post of Rogers name.
Then to top it all off with cherries, she threatens people. Innocent people who only want the truth and have stuck with this story.
I have always supported Aruba and Julia Renfro.
I have always (well, since last July) detested Beth Twitty, thought the answers lie in Mountain Brook.
What SandraK did and continues to do is wrong. No matter who she knows and is close to in RL.
Of all people, SandraK should know how it feels to be intimidated. But she keeps the game going. People who don't know what she is all about (other forums) will keep buying it until it is done to them.
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| MJTenn
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 2:09 pm |
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| BhamMom wrote: | FF,
I think you are absolutely correct in your assement of the situation. I do not think there is any real danger by what has been done because like you, I do not think these people are dangerous in the physical sense. Because I have always stated there was no danger when these events were occuring I have been accused of thinking the release of r/l information is okay. It is not and I have stated it. It is just that what has been posted on r/l people has not been anything that would put their lives in danger.
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snipped for emphasis
No, maybe there is not any "physical danger", per se. But what about the OTHER dangers?
What about ppl who contact family members of posters? Yes, this has happened.
How do we know that this information will not be used in cruel ways? Fact is, we don't. And enough was thrown out there to cause a good bit of worry...for some of us.
For me, I would prefer a threat to my physical self over one that has to do with messing with the lives of my family members.
And all that has nothing to do with whether or not I have talked about my family online. As I have said, I have not contributed to any Paypal funds...here or on any other board.
Someone went to some effort to obtain what they did on me.
Once again, it is not the investigating that is the problem. It is what a loose cannon will do with it. And that could happen with someone I know, or someone I don't know...real life or the internet.
Fooling around with other people's personal lives is just plain old wrong. And, in my view, it is minimizing the issue to boil it down to "there is no physical danger."
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**Deactivated**
Joined: 23 Mar 2006
Posts: 2630
Location: On THE Clue Bus!
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| Zrinyi
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 2:16 pm |
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| BhamMom wrote: | FF,
I think you are absolutely correct in your assement of the situation. I do not think there is any real danger by what has been done because like you, I do not think these people are dangerous in the physical sense. Because I have always stated there was no danger when these events were occuring I have been accused of thinking the release of r/l information is okay. It is not and I have stated it. It is just that what has been posted on r/l people has not been anything that would put their lives in danger.
I disagree, anyone who would go out of their way to investigate a fellow poster on a message board is obsessed and not in their right mind.
This is the internet and regardless of what people say, r/l information can be found on people that post. We are all careless with our personal information at times and do not even realize it. To be honest, I have posted enough about my family and what we do that anyone on this board could go back to some of my old posts and with little effort get my name. If they got that, all they would have to do is look up my phone number because I'm listed and viola.......you would know where I live.
And they would be a sicko for doing so, what is the purpose of knowing such information on a fellow poster?
I guess the point I'm making is that we do tell much about our families and sometimes don't realize just how much. Then again Focus, we all have skeletons in our closet. I'm sure that each and every poster here has a family issue of some kind or other situation we are not proud of.
So. What does that have to do with the Natalee Holloway case? I dont see your point, hmmm...
I guess what I cannot get over is how involved people get with other posters on the personal level. I think that is where the issue comes into play. I mean, how could anyone here find any dirt on me by searching for B'hamMom? They can't. Then again, like I said before, I have given enough personal information in posting that it probably would be possible to do r/l investigating of.
]Sorry to disappoint people but I do not have a criminal record. I don't even have a DUI. [/ In fact, my credit is protected. If anyone even does a search to obtain credit information on me, I get an email telling me who the inquiry was made by. I learned my lesson years ago through my ex-husband with credit cards. I was lucky, I caught what he was doing and maintained my excellent credit. Not everyone is quite so lucky.
LOL I think I am starting to understand you.
A word of caution here. It is worth the money to buy a credit protection plan that will alert you to these problems. The one I have is $12.00 a month and I think of it as an insurance policy. |
I dont appreciate anyone investigating me as a means to intimidate me. I believe those who do investigate fellow posters are dangerous and one should be wary of such people. They are not in their right mind.
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Did not get da Clue
Joined: 29 Jul 2006
Posts: 3690
Location: CIA Headquarters
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| dallas
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 2:18 pm |
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Well SandraK is NOW gone, so, why stir up the muck? Please explain to me what this "thread" is going to accomplish? TIA
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| gilligan
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 2:23 pm |
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Good posts here. What is the purpose of this thread then, FF? Sandrak is banned, maybe for good this time. She has done damage to her own credibility and in some poster's eyes she never had any. Everyone can use their own thought processes to figure her out and some people will still like her. No-one can change that except SandraK.
The whole Fridge thing has me puzzled. I remember reading the same info about her on the Scared Monkeys site many months ago. IMO, it was nothing new but a game.
We all know she's an attention junkie, so why give it to her?
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| FocusFactor
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 2:24 pm |
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BHMom, I agree with you in theory. And I'm not worried about a knock at the door. And I don't have a criminal record, and I don't have very many skeletons, etc, etc.
I am fighting for the principle.
We people behind nics are real people. Some mind being "out there" and known, others don't mind. It is a personal decision. To be threatened with exposure when you do not choose that, is INTIMIDATION.
A search of FocusFactor gets a supplement to enhance memory. A search of "A-B-C" gets you ME.
My/others RL name is on somebodys shit list. They made that known to me/them to intimidate me/them.
I call that a threat. I fully expect it to be carried through.
On one of the threads regarding this issue, grantbk said to me: "if you don't want your info posted, why push it" (paraphrased, and regarding Medley) and that too was a threat.
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** Banned **
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| Zrinyi
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 2:27 pm |
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This isnt the first NH forum where I have been made to fill intimidated. It is not exclusive to SK.
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Did not get da Clue
Joined: 29 Jul 2006
Posts: 3690
Location: CIA Headquarters
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| BhamMom
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 2:30 pm |
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Zrinyi,
They are definitely crazy if they get a kick out of investigating people for sure. What possesses them to do this? Intimidation is the only thing I can think of. That is why it is so important to "guard" our privacy.
Trust me Zrinyi, I've been through the ringer so to speak by an ex's lover. Phone calls around the clock. Calls to my employer and friends. Yes, I've been there. It was not a one time thing, it continued for months. She even went so far as to call the CEO and tried to start crap. But Zriniyi, the thing is these people knew me and knew what I stood for. Yes, it was a pain in the butt and it "hurt" me to think someone could turn on me but did it didn't hurt what my employer thought or what my friends thought of me. They knew me. People that do this is sick, sick sick. Her full intention was to get me fired so I could not support my kids. Funny, she and my ex both got fired and I didn't. I did nothing but both their employers tracked their calls and time away without me saying a word. I have call block but you can't block a pay phone. That is what she was doing. Driving around town putting the quarters in. People go to great lengths to harass but will eventually give up.
We talk about Beth establishing Natalee's character but that is what is important with each of us. My character withstood any damage they tried. It was stressful, yes. I lost sleep and weight but it eventually ended. Unfortunately I gained more weight than I lost.  and I still blame that witch for that. 
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** Banned **
Joined: 23 Mar 2006
Posts: 13086
Location: Posting with bitter people
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| FocusFactor
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 2:34 pm |
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| gilligan wrote: | Good posts here. What is the purpose of this thread then, FF? Sandrak is banned, maybe for good this time. She has done damage to her own credibility and in some poster's eyes she never had any. Everyone can use their own thought processes to figure her out and some people will still like her. No-one can change that except SandraK.
The whole Fridge thing has me puzzled. I remember reading the same info about her on the Scared Monkeys site many months ago. IMO, it was nothing new but a game.
We all know she's an attention junkie, so why give it to her? |
I brought it here because the whole issue got lost in Jenny-bash.
It isn't about like or dislike. I "liked" SandraK just fine.
The discussion is good to have. I'm no way near paranoid about people on message boards knowing "stuff" about me, I post in a friendly manner for the most part (notice I said for the most part, I'm not that great) so I don't mind saying things like "my daughter's wedding", etc, my toddler's "potty training, etc.
I just am very freaked and upset over someone I absolutely trusted holding something over me, even when it only matters to me. I seriously doubt that any of you care what my or my neighbors home is worth, but what if I had something I didn't want anyone to know? I don't, just to make that clear, I'm boring.
But I am arguing the principle.
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** Banned **
Joined: 23 Mar 2006
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| Zrinyi
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 2:36 pm |
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| BhamMom wrote: | Zrinyi,
They are definitely crazy if they get a kick out of investigating people for sure. What possesses them to do this? Intimidation is the only thing I can think of. That is why it is so important to "guard" our privacy.
Trust me Zrinyi, I've been through the ringer so to speak by an ex's lover. Phone calls around the clock. Calls to my employer and friends. Yes, I've been there. It was not a one time thing, it continued for months. She even went so far as to call the CEO and tried to start crap. But Zriniyi, the thing is these people knew me and knew what I stood for. Yes, it was a pain in the butt and it "hurt" me to think someone could turn on me but did it didn't hurt what my employer thought or what my friends thought of me. They knew me. People that do this is sick, sick sick. Her full intention was to get me fired so I could not support my kids. Funny, she and my ex both got fired and I didn't. I did nothing but both their employers tracked their calls and time away without me saying a word. I have call block but you can't block a pay phone. That is what she was doing. Driving around town putting the quarters in. People go to great lengths to harass but will eventually give up.
We talk about Beth establishing Natalee's character but that is what is important with each of us. My character withstood any damage they tried. It was stressful, yes. I lost sleep and weight but it eventually ended. Unfortunately I gained more weight than I lost. and I still blame that witch for that. |
Well, I never dealt with that sort of problem.
I do know who at BFN had my real name. The same person who wanted me to feel as if I were being stalked.
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Did not get da Clue
Joined: 29 Jul 2006
Posts: 3690
Location: CIA Headquarters
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| victims cry
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 2:53 pm |
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this is the MODERATED forum. You want to bash, go to HE.
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On Vacation!
Joined: 22 Mar 2006
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| gilligan
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 2:54 pm |
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| FocusFactor wrote: | | gilligan wrote: | | Whatever Sandrak does on this or any other board does not affect me. Not at all. I am only responding to FF's claim that sandrak's latest crap affects everyone. |
gilligan, I know it doesn't affect you. It won't affect any of the people who posted with SandraK on the BDR thread, unless she hates them.
Sandra told me things in PMs to get me to post it. I didn't take that bait.
When I say it affects the board, I am talking in general terms.
SandraK was here for how long? A year now? First she was thought to be in Aruba, then paying attention it was clearer.
She pretended to be some exotic person who KNEW things. Things only "in the know" posters knew. Ones with "inside information". It was used as a tease. Which is fine.
But when she said things that could be only rumor:
"the Twittys divorce"
"MB kids bought heroin traded ipods"
"the bar bill was 18K"
lots of "things" little tidbits, like-- about GVC, like-- about Lorenzo, like about people in ALE, like-- about-- lots of things I can't even recall.
we went with that as fact. Me included. I remember arguing over it on CTV, and even here I was buying it all hook line and sinker but it was a GAME. I don't know, I would believe some of it to be still true.
My wake up call came when she was outraged over the Fridge outing of her.
And then turned it around with a lot of lying, pretense, drama, and then finally the time-out post of Rogers name.
Then to top it all off with cherries, she threatens people. Innocent people who only want the truth and have stuck with this story.
I have always supported Aruba and Julia Renfro.
I have always (well, since last July) detested Beth Twitty, thought the answers lie in Mountain Brook.
What SandraK did and continues to do is wrong. No matter who she knows and is close to in RL.
Of all people, SandraK should know how it feels to be intimidated. But she keeps the game going. People who don't know what she is all about (other forums) will keep buying it until it is done to them. |
Isn't this the reason for the thread? People at other forums can make up their own minds about her and some of them will still like her. You can't save the world from SandraK.
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| dallas
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 3:02 pm |
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| dallas wrote: | Well SandraK is NOW gone, so, why stir up the muck? Please explain to me what this "thread" is going to accomplish? TIA
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FF please? TIA. Trying to understand here is all.
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Joined: 23 Mar 2006
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| resigned
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 3:05 pm |
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This is the Moderated Forum?
I clicked on it in the unmoderated. To be honest, I thought that threads with posters names in it wasn't permitted on either.
And no thank you...I have no desire to go the HE.
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Click your heels together...
Joined: 14 Aug 2006
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| FocusFactor
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 3:10 pm |
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| dallas wrote: | | dallas wrote: | Well SandraK is NOW gone, so, why stir up the muck? Please explain to me what this "thread" is going to accomplish? TIA
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FF please? TIA. Trying to understand here is all. |
dallas, first, no one is ever GONE.
If this were 6 months later it would be stirring up the muck, but this issue is from this past week.
You are right, no doubt. This thread won't accomplish anything. None of our threads do.
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** Banned **
Joined: 23 Mar 2006
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| dallas
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 3:21 pm |
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| FocusFactor wrote: | | dallas wrote: | | dallas wrote: | Well SandraK is NOW gone, so, why stir up the muck? Please explain to me what this "thread" is going to accomplish? TIA
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FF please? TIA. Trying to understand here is all. |
dallas, first, no one is ever GONE.
If this were 6 months later it would be stirring up the muck, but this issue is from this past week.
You are right, no doubt. This thread won't accomplish anything. None of our threads do. |
Thanks FF -- i appreciate your answer.
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Joined: 23 Mar 2006
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| BhamMom
Posted:
Fri Sep 29, 2006 4:26 pm |
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Focus,
Correct me if I'm wrong. You are telling us that you were told the paypal information was being used to dig up r/l information. Is this correct? If this is the case, Medley HAD that information. Am I to assume that Medley has now shared that information with others? I know that what has been discussed is that Sandra and Medley seem to be outing but I'm asking if they are the ones doing the investigation. Did they give the information to another poster (here or elsewhere) to the the investigation?
Let me go one step deeper........Is it JUST Medley and Sandra that we have to fear releasing r/l information? In other words, for all we know this information could have been given to some idiot on another forum to be used, am I correct? Geez........what if Debbie or Dayo or someone else has this? What would happen then?
Zrinyi,
I also have a question for you please. You came here from BFN, am I correct? You also stated that you gave your r/l name to one person there if I recall correctly. If you gave your information to someone at BFN how was SandraK able to research you? Or, did she really research you that you know? This seems unreal in a way. Is the person at BFN still there that has your r/l name? Is this person a true BFN person or a make believe to get r/l info on people?
To everyone else here I am asking if you think it is possible that Sandra and/or Medley has connections to other forums that do not favor RU and would possibly use it to hurt us? Gosh, I hope not. To be honest, I have always liked Sandra and Medley and I would truly be disappointed if this was the case. I will say one thing, just because I like someone doesn't mean I trust them fully. Heck, I don't trust my very best friend with some things. You just have to learn what and whom to trust through experience. Unfortunately, it is usually things like this that teaches the best lesson.
Please everyone, guard yourself at all times on the internet. You never know who may be gathering info on you. Internet posting is a risk. I enjoy boards and have no intention in not posting but I am also aware of the risk. After going through what I did with my ex (yes, he hacked my computer also) I realized that common people have the ability to obtain information on anyone.
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Joined: 23 Mar 2006
Posts: 13086
Location: Posting with bitter people
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